Conflict is an everyday process of life. Not all disputes have to be negative or nasty. Conflict can be an excellent process to further communication and share thoughts for all to hear. With the age of social media, conflict resolution seems to be a fading skill. Things are either said mostly behind someone’s back, on a blog or not at all. If you are having issues at work, you need to use your voice and use it effectively. Not confronting your workplace issues can cause more significant concerns moving forward. Many employees voice their frustrations only to other coworkers or family members without every getting relief. Here are a few tips to help you deal with workplace issues.
Ask yourself some fundamental questions before you approach anyone. Why do you feel offended? Was it a personal attack or a trigger? If someone said something that triggers you, is it them or you? Is the paycheck worth it? Bullshit has a price maybe its time you lower yours and stop letting people treat you less than worthy. Think it through and make sure you have all the facts in order.
Face it head-on, timing is everything. Bringing up concerns at a later time doesn’t help anyone. The employee you have the issue with may not even recall the situation and how do you think it will help things then. If someone does something you do not like, tell them immediately. Your delivery does not have to be aggressive, but it does have to be direct. You can pull them aside the point here is to tell them face to face.
Stop being passive-aggressiveness
I am guilty of this one if someone had wronged you then say what they did and why it is wrong. Do not consider how your coworkers might react or feel, you will lose the message (and focus), and this is about the offender fixing it. You are the priority here; never forget the importance of that. Your emotions are no longer going to take a back seat to anyone else’s, especially when they are the culprit.
Once you have used your voice, move on. If you are still holding on to it, there is no one to blame but yourself. You cannot change anyone; none of these tips are to change anyone but the one in the mirror. You have a right to be heard, and they have a right to know they wronged you, but they do not HAVE to change.
Trauma is also a part of life, and many of us need counseling. As stated above, make sure those around you are not merely activating some of your triggers. That would not be their responsibility to help with that, that is on you. Therapy is not a bad thing; it is about being healthier. You don’t have to broadcast it to your coworkers or give any specific details ( I would refrain). Get help for you, not for anyone else.
Yes, I said quit. This option needs to be talked about more. If a situation is that bad, then you need to leave immediately. Toxic conditions have a way of staying with you mentally long after you have left. Moving earlier lessens the residual pain of those environments. Planning is always the most logical choice, to find another job and then leave, but if you are going through emotional turmoil, you need to go. Some situations cannot be mended even with proper communication and time.
Sanity is a benefit HR cannot provide you with!
Remember, with most behaviors positive and negative, and once you allow it, they will continue. You must speak your truth and to let your voice shine. There are too many of us not speaking up. No one should have to work in a toxic environment. However, once acknowledged, it is up to you to fix it or move on.